Does Insta-Love Only Exist in YA or Is It Actually Exist in Real Life?

YA books have many tropes, especially in the romance department.

Enemies turn lovers, friends turn lovers, the prince(ss) and the pauper, the forbidden romance… Just pick your favorites. But there is one we all can’t handle and groan when it happen, in fact it can ruin our reading experience at some instance.

Ladies and gentlemen, meet the most hated trope (beside love-shapes), the insta-love.

From Disney movies to YA books, Insta-love is always present. It’s just always there. Sometimes it takes longer, maybe 5 days before our characters started saying “I love you”s to each other. Sometimes it takes shorter, like a day, or a night, before our character 100000% sure that he/she is the one.

And it got us rolling our eyes and screaming to oblivion “YOU CAN’T LOVE SOMEONE YOU JUST MEET”.

Because we all know, to truly love someone, we need to truly know them.

As much as I hate insta-love, I have to admit that it managed to paint a picture to the reality of how we, teenagers, young adult, and sometimes even adult, fall in “love” too quickly and think that we’re in “love”, being very sure that our significant other is the one only to realize later that they are not.

Is it love really? Or is it just attraction?

According to Oxford dictionary:


The action or power of evoking interest in or liking for someone or something

LOVE (n);

A strong feeling of affection

The difference aren’t very clear right? Love and attraction are different, but not all of us can distinguish them.

For someone who is experiencing love for the first time like most YA characters we know, it’s perfectly understandable for them to have insta-love. But maybe, what we are reading as insta- love is more like insta-atraction? While not as extreme as “I WANNA SPEND MY WHOLE LIFE WITH YOU” level like our YA characters, we all have experience the urge of getting to know someone better and spend more time with them in short time period.

As much as I hate insta-love, I can’t blame them because it actually mirrors our perception and misconception of love. Many of us misinterpreted attraction, and I think it’s normal since that’s how we grow and learn. Books only highlight some parts of our characters’ live, and all we know is, in those short pages between books, our characters fell in love and found their happiness. We might be wrong in naming the trope insta-love while it’s actually insta-attraction, or characters might be actually falling in love THAT fast. Only the authors and characters will ever find out I guess😉

What do you think of insta-love? Do you love them or hate them? Or just plain don’t care about them?

On Growing Up and Letting Go

27 thoughts on “Does Insta-Love Only Exist in YA or Is It Actually Exist in Real Life?

  1. Great post! I dislike insta-love, but I do get (and like!) insta-attraction and insta-lust. It’s also not just a YA problem, I recently read an adult romance where the hero decided the woman he’d just met (like 2 minutes ago, they spoke 3 sentences and he didn’t even know her name) was THE ONE and proceeded to change his – and her – entire life because of it. So offputting.


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